Is Grandpa going to die?
Is what KP asked me this morning, while I was sobbing in the Target parking lot on my cell phone, while retelling what happened at my dad’s oncologist visit to Jennifer.
It has hit. The hammer has come down. There is another change.
My dad’s psa levels are on the rise again, along with increased bone pain and stability. The news, and what my father has dreaded most “you now need chemo”, in order to help his metastasized prostate cancer, has come to roost. His doctor told us today, after hormone therapy and then another drug of choice have both worked for a bit and failed, that chemo is next. And he has wanted NOTHING to do with it since this whole ordeal began.
As I found out today, to my dad, chemo = death. His doctor told him that it is not the chemo that is going to kill him, it’s the disease. So do what you can. And with those words alone, the tide shifted slightly.
Oh I’m not here to tell you he’s happy about this next step, but he is opening the door and knows there is not much choice (I think the doctor said it best, your choice is this or Hospice) but to walk through it.
So today, after the tears had fallen and the news had sunk in a little deeper, we did what we do best, we went out to relish the sunshine, get an ice cream cone and enjoyed each others company.
And then, he asked Adam to shave his head.
4 Responses to “Is Grandpa going to die?”
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Wow, he actually looks younger and more handsome. It’s a small thing…but it’s something. Jen
I completely agree — very handsome! You’re all in my prayers.
Crap. Oh, dear Mary, I am so sorry this is something you and your loved ones have to trudge through. The SurlyCrew is pulling for each and every one of you. We love you guys.
oh mary . . .