Where do your razors go?

I have the world’s ugliest feet. My toes are all misaligned due to too many years on the balance beam during those formative toe years. They are always cold, which gives them this dead sort of bluish hue. And for some reason I have more dead skin on my feet than I’m sure anyone else on the planet.

In order to cure one of my problems, I like to take a razor to the calluses. This normally works just fine; however, one must be cautious and careful when doing this type of procedure at home.

Yesterday, I found myself with too much time in a hot shower. After doing all the normal things one does in a shower, I went after my toe calluses. After shearing most of the dead skin off I went for one last swipe and somehow dug that razor right into perfectly sweet soft flesh. The double bladed wound is only a little smaller than a dime but damn if that thing wouldn’t stop bleeding.

Did you know that if you are wearing flip flops and your foot is bleeding it throws the blood in an amazing picturesque array all over the floor?

I only needed to walk about 25 feet to my locker.

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