Blame it on Rio

I was cutting my toe cuticles in the gym bathroom this morning and felt really weird about it. I started thinking, should I really be clipping in the gym bathroom? Is that gross? I am pretty sure I wouldn’t like to watch someone else clipping their toes there. So, I tried to find an out-of-the-way place to get the job done. I didn’t want anyone thinking I was just clipping and leaving them lay on the floor for bare-footed, freshly showered folks to walk upon.

I found a nice little bench to sit on, in a little room that contained a scale and a few hooks. Shortly afterward, another woman came waltzing in, dropped her towel, stepped on the scale and there I was, standing face-to-face with her very stylish coochy snort.

Firstly, I felt very uncomfortable about being so close to a woman’s you know what. I started to sweat and could barely get out the “excuse me” as I ducked my head to get up and leave.

Secondly, I felt like I was in a really bad porn film, I could almost hear the music in the background, bum bumbumm boww wwwwoooowwww.

Thirdly, I knew I had to write about this and was going to title the post, “Can you feel the Brazilian heat?” However, I decided I better check to see if I was calling “it” the right thing. Well, I wasn’t. This woman did not have a Brazilian. Having a Brazilian, means you have taken it ALL off. She had something else, which I think may be called a Landing Strip or the Gucci Coochy or something like that. I’m not actually sure, it all got a bit foggy there at the end. However, what I do know for sure is that I don’t want to know how my fellow 5:00am gym-goers express themselves through their pubic hair.

I won’t be clipping there again!

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