Just not sure about this

This week is the first week that PJ does not have school. CT will be out of school next week. Then…we all will be spending a lot of time together.

From what I have seen over the past two days, it is going to be a big adjustment for everyone, maybe especially for me. They have been crazy and insane and fighting with each other…OH THE FIGHTING! I feel like I have been in charge of the monkey cage at the zoo and a hungry pack of hyenas got in and are eating them alive.

I guess I didn’t realize how dependent I have become of that bus that comes to take my first born away from me for nearly 3 ½ hours or those couple hours where PJ is dropped off to learn how to get along with others. And to be brutally honest, the thought of ALL three of them being in my charge from 7:00am to 8:00 pm seven days a week, makes me quake.

Sweet Lord give me grace!

Crapables

Today was the third time in the lifetime of my children that I have purchased Lunchables. We were out of milk, or for that matter, anything at all that was edible and the bus was coming for CT in 30 minutes.

So there we, walking the line between sleepy crying baby, over tired preschooler and anxious about to miss the bus kindergartener and I chose to take them into the store. Two steps out of the car CT side swipes PJ’s leg and down she goes. She takes two more steps and stubs her toe. Then karma catches up with him and he gets his foot caught under the wheel of the cart. As usual, screaming ensued. I stopped, looked at them and told them, if they could find it within themselves to be good in the store, they could pick out their own lunch. So there you have it, they complied. And they chose Lunchables.

Just so you know I hate Lunchables. If you wanted to torture me to get our family secrets or the locks from our safes all you would have to do is tie me up, starve me for a few hours and then stick a Lunchable in front of me. I would vomit at the sight of it and then proceed to give you anything you wanted. I could drone on and on about how bad for my children they are…the sugar…the fillers… oh I must stop…the slimy processed meat and cheese…but they LOVE them. Or, at least they love the idea of them. Or as Whitney put it, they love the kiddy marketing (rotten Oscar Mayer bastards) of them.

And as you can see, the juice and the dessert are gone and the rest went down the disposal.

Do you see the apple slices; those were a vein attempt on my part to not feel so guilty about feeding my children crap. You see how well that went over.

Luscious lips

I have found a new favorite beatification product for summer 06. This lip gloss not only makes your lips moist and luxurious but it has SPF 20 to protect them, slight color to enhance them and a cooling agent that makes them tingle.

Who wouldn’t want that?

My crazy curse

This past weekend I got to enjoy time away, by myself, to see my dear friend Stephanie marry a true, bona fide, 10 gallon hat, big belt buckle, cowboy boot, amazingly large mustache wearing cowboy.

I made the journey out to Colorado late Friday night and was back in no time flat on Sunday afternoon. My re-entry into the family went fine. My mother even brought over dinner after dropping CT off from a birthday party.

The long day drew to a close. Everyone was tucked nicely into their beds to get a good night sleep so we would all be rested for our upcoming week.

Then at 12:15 am CT woke me up to tell me his stomach hurt.
Then at 1:37 am CT woke me up to tell me he needed a bucket.
Then at 2:12 am CT filled the bucket with barf and proceeded to fill most of the toilet bowl as well.
Then at 2:32 am CT came back down to get out the rest of the lingering bile that was left in his stomach.

This story seems vaguely familiar to the last time I left for a little get-a-way.

What am I doing to deserve this?

At least she said it with a smile

As the boys and I gathered PJ and her things up from preschool, one of the other mothers was running a few minutes late. As she ran down the hall looking a bit up-in-arms, she passed us, looked at me and said, “I feel like you today.”

It took me a few moments to process her comment. And as I put my kids in the car, she came walking out with her son. I jokingly said to her, “Hey, are you telling me I’m always running late and looking frazzled.”

And with a big grin on her face and a slight chuckle in her voice she said, “Yes Mary…yes I am.”

A few of my backyard favorites…

TWO – 2 – II

Dear KP,
It’s hard to believe you have been in our family for two whole years, and it is even harder to imagine life without you. You are amazing and funny and crazy and wonderful.

You are the baby, who isn’t a baby. You are like a little bottle of soda pop that has been shaken and everything inside is ready to GOOOOOOO, once the top is off or in your case once the door is open. You love being too rough. You love carrying the cat around the house. You love being naked. You love whatever it is your siblings are doing. You love worms and balls and splashing in puddles. You love CAKE. You love it all.

And we love you…you little crazy monkey. May two be even better than one.

I love you so much…Happy 2nd birthday.

Mom

Daily grind

Just this morning my job duties consisted of the following:

1. unplug clogged toilet
2. make breakfast
3. clean up the abundance of mashed-up feces that spilled over, ALL OVER, the bathroom (due to the fact that I flushed too soon before the clog was expelled)
4. fed children breakfast
5. bleach all towels that were used in the bathroom clean-up endeavor
6. wipe down wall that was strewn with yogurt at breakfast and small child who somehow bathed himself in yogurt at the breakfast table
7. chased small child who prefers to whip off diaper and run around the house naked
8. clean-up breakfast dishes
9. get all children dressed
10. clean up the poop on the floor and the stairs that got launched when the small child discarded diaper
11. wipe-up cat vomit on the way out the door, at 9:40 am

Discipline gone a muck

The kids spent the night at my parents house last Saturday so Adam and I could be well rested and up and at’em early for the race. My parents, ok mostly my dad, couldn’t believe how much energy it took to keep up with the three of them. And they had them for less than 24 hours.

When we picked them up my parents were full of stories. Stories of how the kids didn’t get to bed until 11:00 pm and how they eat 27 pancakes between the three of them and how they picked all the dandelions in the yard and took out every single toy in the toy chest plus a couple extra they didn’t even realize they had.

Then my dad laughingly said, “I just can’t believe KP. He really never stops. CT and I were building a castle together out of blocks and KP came over five separate times and knocked it down. When I told him to stop, he got mad at me and then came running toward me with a bat and hit me in the head.”

I am so glad he somehow thought that was funny.

Death march at mile 11

This past Sunday Adam, my two running partners and I ran the Wells Fargo ½ Marathon. It was a beautiful day to run around the lake and take in all the torturous hills that came along with the course.

My typical running schedule doesn’t include a lot of hill work outs. But that is surely going to change, but only after my quadriceps fuse back onto both femurs and I can walk down the stairs again.

It wasn’t just the hills; it was pushing myself as hard as I could go to find out what I really had in there. I had several levels of expectations, it looked something like this: 9 minute miles – not so happy, 8 minute 30 second miles – which was my main goal and I would be happy, 8 minute 15 second miles – I would be insanely excited and would treat myself to a full body massage and a wonderfully expensive dinner out with copious amounts of champagne.

I ended up at 8:30, which I am happy with. But in reaching that goal I realized that it was much harder to attain than I thought it was going to be. I could not have run ANY faster or ANY farther for that matter. And, if I indeed want to make Boston a reality, I have a lot farther to go.

Hmmm…wondering if it is worth it???